Sassy

[dxm2]

Friday was a weird, weird night.

I play in a men's rec soccer league, and we played on Friday. After leading the game by 5 for most of it, the team we were playing against scored 8 goals in the last four minutes of the game. Then my car broke down on the way home (it was on the other side of town) and I had to call a cab, and the driver who picked me up didn't speak English and seemed to have no idea where he was, how to get to the part of town where I lived, or how to drive. The team was supposed to meet up at a bar two hours later, but for some reason three different people texted three different bars to meet at and so we never did all hook up.

The bar I ended up at had a pool table, which two of us were playing when a pair of younger women (late-20/early 30s, blond and brunette) asked to play myself and my friend. They looked very much out of place. The bar we were at was a t-shirt jeans (an not necessarily clean, either) joint, the kind that has darts and still smells like cigarettes from years ago before they were forbidden in bars. The women were dressed and heavily make-upped, as if they had been on their way to a downtown dance club and got lost on the way.

One of them - the blond - was really sweet and flirty, and I liked her a lot from the get go. The other, the brunette, was kind of intensely mean. Every time I missed a shot, she laughed and made an insult that did not seem in any way made in good spirits. When I made a good shot, she'd say something like, "oh, I guess you think you're hot shit, right?" She looked like she was going to lose her temper at any moment. Mostly, I just tried to ignore her and chat up her friend.

After the game, the brunette came up and said, "I know who you are, you know." And she did. She knew my name, where I worked, and a bunch of other stuff. She said she was a friend of Jane Doe (not the actual name she used), and that what I did to Jane Doe was really shitty. Apparently, according to the brunette, Jane Doe was a woman I spent the night with, then the subsequent morning and afternoon with, and then never called. "She says you two obviously clicked, and that it was an amazing night and that that kind of passion doesn't come around often between two people, so she was really hurt when you blew her off."

I found this story very weird. First of all, I had no memory of Jane Doe or any of the other details the brunette provided. Second, I know that some guys are into bedding and leaving, but I've never really understood that mindset. If I meet a woman I'm attracted to enough to not only roll in the hay with, but get up and do it again in the morning, why the hell wouldn't I want to go back for more? Besides, even though sometimes anonymous, never-see-you-again sex is... well, sexy, it's only sexy if both people are in that mindset. Plus, in my experience sex is a usually lot better the second time. So I seriously had no idea if I really had forgotten a night of great sex and blown someone off (which would truly mortify me), or if this woman was a lunatic (mortifying for different reasons), or something else.

Anyway, she was really laying into me and everyone in the bar was watching while pretending they weren't, and I finally got sick of it and just got up and left to go home. And the brunette followed me out, chewing me out for being a "conceited asshole" the entire way. When I hailed a cab, she just got in after me. And then - and I swear to God I have no idea how this happened, exactly, or even who started it - within a few minutes in the cab we were making out like drunk teenagers. And then she came home with me, and got cranky with the music I put on and demanded angrily that I put on the White Stripes (a band I don't particularly enjoy) and then fucked my brains out.

After we finished, an hour and a half later, she got up and started getting dressed. "You know, I still don't actually know your name," I said as she was putting on her shoes. She laughed, and said, "So you can get my hopes up and never call like you did to Jane Doe? I bet you'd love that. Yeah, like I'm really going to do that." And then she left, and I dubbed her Sassy.

Like I say, weird night.

[dxm2]

Parts four and five of my night with Sassy.

[Quadrophenia1]

This is so cool and unlike ANYTHING else on this site. Once again, you're the master at ever so slowly driving women absolutely out of their minds. Bravo DXM !

[Soundbite]

Great accompanying story to flesh out the whole posting. And the blond? How did your friend shape, if at all? Thank you.

[Soundbite]

Still got a couple of posts to listen to, but had these thoughts on how this "stranger" knew all about you:
1) The Jane Doe did tell her about your prowess, and now she is stalking you!
2) Your details are written up as graffiti on the walls/door of the ladies loo!
3) the US administration has had you under surveillance and she is a 'drone'!

The lady's attitude at first meeting, brings to mind that line in Evita [play/film], when Magaldi is asked: "Do all your one-night stands give you so much trouble?" Well, maybe you didn't do too well with the bar's cue, but did alright with your own.

[gatinho75]

Hey, great story! But that you still were able to record the evening after all this circumstances

Good job!

[sexyreadhead]

as a long time reader of your exploits on e.s.f., dxm, i gotta say that i love the stories you tell where things go haywire more than the ones where everything goes off perfectly.

hilarious and hot all at the same time.

[giswampy]

Excellent! Thanks a lot for posting.

[mahlersymphony]

Oddly, the White Stripes seemed to be the appropriate soundtrack to the goings on. Sounds like she hit you like a Seven Nation Army.

[bennoman57]

Totally believed all your story but for one bit. Eight goals in four minutes, no way Jose!!!

[Audio]

cool story and nice recording. The Music annoys be a bit though

[Quadrophenia1]

Yeah..... those Detroit bands are occasionally in-your-face and annoying, LOL !! (Iggy, Nugent, MC5, Eminem, Kid Rock)

[dxm2]

Totally believed all your story but for one bit. Eight goals in four minutes, no way Jose!!!

Sadly, this is more believable if you ever watched us play. I like us a lot, but we are terrible.

[audioman]

Another absolutely frigging stellar catch. A great story to go along with it too. These files would be awesome anyhow but your stories really fill in the details.

I agree with what another poster said, in a weird sort of way that music kind of fit the story, but I agree I probably wouldn't just sit and listen to that group too much, and for the record I like all sorts of music, heavy and mellow old and new.

Thanks for sharing, looking forward to your next post!

Regards,

The Audioman