Swing Lifestyle Questions

[Paul7979]

So here are some questions about the LS

1.First of all how long have you been in the LS, how old are you and your partner and when and how did you start ?

2. What is the age of the people you meet or you see around being part of it ?

3. How has your relationship with the partner evolved during this period ?

4 Do you use online sites or you just go to clubs?

5. What about Std and how often do you test ? Is it rude or unpractical to ask others to exhibit their test results ?

6. When having intercourse how long does it take in average ? Do people bring toys?

7. How orgasmic are people in average in the LS ? Do you often meet multiorgasmic women ? Are there any multiorgasmic men ? With multiorgasmic I mean the ability to have more than one orgasm in a single session

8. I have heard many men are subject to performance issues thus most of them use cialis or Viagra or pt141.. is that true ?

9. Do you disclose it to your friends ? If yes how do they react to it?

Thanks

[rabbit61]

Let me premise this by saying I live in the U.S. and there are lifestyle communities throughout the globe, so my experience may be different from those in different parts of each country and different parts of the world.

1.First of all how long have you been in the LS, how old are you and your partner and when and how did you start ?

I'm not comfortable disclosing my exact age but lets just say I am over 40 and have been in the lifestyle for around 10-15 years. I typically meet people that are in the lifestyle and they range in age from 30-60 yrs old.

2. What is the age of the people you meet or you see around being part of it ?

Most people in the lifestyle around where I live are between 30-70 years old. The majority are probably in their 40s-50s.

3. How has your relationship with the partner evolved during this period ?

I am divorced and have no desire to get married again, so I have gone through a few "friends with benefits" relationships. All I have met have been in the lifestyle.

4 Do you use online sites or you just go to clubs?

I used to frequent clubs when I had a regular play partner but it gets tiresome going by yourself. Mostly just use online sites now.

5. What about Std and how often do you test ? Is it rude or unpractical to ask others to exhibit their test results ?

Most in the lifestyle are very safety and health concious and get tested regularly and always insist on condoms/protection. Some do ask for test results but most go on the honor system.

6. When having intercourse how long does it take in average ? Do people bring toys?

Sex is different for differnt people, I have heard some stories about "minute men". Some ladies like guys to be quick, some like guys to take a very long time. All partners are different. I have not seen anyone bring toys at any of the events I have been to.

7. How orgasmic are people in average in the LS ? Do you often meet multiorgasmic women ? Are there any multiorgasmic men ? With multiorgasmic I mean the ability to have more than one orgasm in a single session

Again, all people are different. I have met women that have difficulty achieving even one orgasm and others that orgasm the entire time having sex, and even others that can orgasm while they are still clothed. All people are different.

8. I have heard many men are subject to performance issues thus most of them use cialis or Viagra or pt141.. is that true ?

When I was 18-25 I was able to go for 4-5 hours straight with no "performance enhancing drugs" lol. I am no longer in that phase of life so I have no problem admitting I take something to help. All guys are different.

9. Do you disclose it to your friends ? If yes how do they react to it?

This is a personal decision and depends on the person. Myself I prefer to keep it private and only share my lifestyle tales with others in the lifestyle.

So here are some questions about the LS

1.First of all how long have you been in the LS, how old are you and your partner and when and how did you start ?

2. What is the age of the people you meet or you see around being part of it ?

3. How has your relationship with the partner evolved during this period ?

4 Do you use online sites or you just go to clubs?

5. What about Std and how often do you test ? Is it rude or unpractical to ask others to exhibit their test results ?

6. When having intercourse how long does it take in average ? Do people bring toys?

7. How orgasmic are people in average in the LS ? Do you often meet multiorgasmic women ? Are there any multiorgasmic men ? With multiorgasmic I mean the ability to have more than one orgasm in a single session

8. I have heard many men are subject to performance issues thus most of them use cialis or Viagra or pt141.. is that true ?

9. Do you disclose it to your friends ? If yes how do they react to it?

Thanks

[Paul7979]

Thanks a lot. Appreciate your answers.. in the beginning I wanted to ask 2 or 3 questions but given the positive feedback I opted for more!

[rabbit61]

A few other notes from my experiences in the lifestyle. Again, this may just be typical for my area or may be applicable in your area too:

1) While I have met some ladies that do search for "Big Guy" types, there are many that prefer normal or smaller size. All ladies are different and to some larger guys hurt too much.

2) Some of the sex clubs can be very "Clique-Ish" meaning people sometimes tend to socialize only with a select few.

3) There are generally 7 types of swingers
- Couples looking for another girl
- Couples looking for another guy
- Couples looking for other couples
- Bi/Gay guys looking for other guys
- Couples looking for a group of guys for his wife/girlfriend
- Couples that do not play with others but like to be watched
- Couples that just like to watch others

4) I rarely ever see single girls at the swing clubs. This happens maybe less than 5% of all the time I have been to clubs. Single guys are much more prevalent. The ratio at most swing clubs are about 60/40 or 75/25 guys to girls.

5) The first time someone goes to a swing club it usually just involves watching others and getting comfortable with the atmosphere.

6) Swing clubs are basically like regular dance clubs except it is acceptable to be naked/see others having sex in public areas. Most of the ones I have been to are converted houses with dance floors, pools, hot tubs, billiard tables, snacks and lots of bar/tables for people to sit.

7) Some of the most entertaining events I have seen at swing clubs:

- Sitting at a table, there is a lady about 2 feet away at another table, has a gentlemen she is talking with. I am scanning the room looking around and when I turn back around guy has his pants down, she is giving him a blowjob and he makes some comment about "Yeah I just got out of Prison"

- A see a very fit attractive lady enter the club one evening. I figure she is very picky so just watch her for a bit. About 15 minutes after arriving she goes into a "group room" where pretty much anything goes. Next thing I know there is a line of about 20-30 guys, all taking their turns with her like 3 or 4 at a time and she is not saying no to one of them. Looking through the line I swear one of the guys looks like that "I could burn the place down" dude from the movie Office Space (yes - Milton) lol. About 3 hours into her event she takes a water break and I over hear her saying "Yeah, I'm trying to lose 8 lbs for an upcoming bodybuilding competition" LMAO. She was in that room for about 4 or 5 hours straight. When the club is getting ready to close the lights come on I see her still bouncing like a rabbit on top of some guy.

- One lady play friend I had was into girls and guys. She is not shy and one night she was feeling frisky and she just starts going up to ladies sitting with their husbands and just says hi then starts molesting them, grabbing their boobs, kissing them and grinding on them, etc. LOL.

The "clientele" at clubs can vary greatly. I have seen people dress in everything from business suits and cocktail dresses and others come in looking like they just came from a backyard barbecue. Most single guys usually try and dress nicely and ladies sometimes wear lingerie or something revealing. While there are some overweight and unattractive people at some clubs most are what I would consider in the 5-8 range on a 10-scale.

9) Some clubs cater to the crossdressing/transgender lifestyle, and some clubs do not. It really just depends on the target audience for the swing club.

10) While it is not uncommon to see single guys at the swing club, most are of the patrons are couples. The ration at most clubs I have seen is usually 80% are couples. I am not usually very social so personally I usually have more fun at the clubs when going with a partner.

[Paul7979]

Thanks again for the detailed info..

I have been reading about this topic and I can relate to most of the things you say .

You have a long-standing experience, have you seen many swinger couples break up or it's a rare event ?

Have you ever seen men able to have dry orgasms? Or men interested in this ?

[rabbit61]

No to both questions. I am not close with swinger couples, but doubt that is ever a reason if they should break up. No interest in men orgasms aside from my own lol

Thanks again for the detailed info..

I have been reading about this topic and I can relate to most of the things you say .

You have a long-standing experience, have you seen many swinger couples break up or it's a rare event ?

Have you ever seen men able to have dry orgasms? Or men interested in this ?

[Paul7979]

Thank you.. I'm not interested in the men's orgasm per se but in the ability to have multiple orgasms

[eyeofthestorm]

Thank you Paul7979,
I am going to add some answers from my point of view, from a different (European) background.

1.First of all how long have you been in the LS, how old are you and your partner and when and how did you start ?
We both are in our 50s, she at the beginning, I´m towards the end.
My first experience was in my 30s when I was married but my wife thought I´m a pervert talking to her about some fantasies like sharing / swinging. I approached the topic carefully and noticed how aroused she got but no chance. So I visited a club twice during business trips. My curiosity got satisfied but I didn´t want to live that lifestyle alone.
A lot of live later I met my recent partner and she got some experience that she told me about. She went to clubs with a previous partner, had an only club buddy later but she paused for some years before we met and recently began visiting clubs as a couple.

2. What is the age of the people you meet or you see around being part of it ?
Like rabbit61 said.

3. How has your relationship with the partner evolved during this period ?
As a couple we´re fresh in the lifestyle but it has some influence on our fantasies during sex

4. Do you use online sites or you just go to clubs?
Clubs as a couple, checking out parties (and possible partners) online.

5. What about Std and how often do you test ? Is it rude or unpractical to ask others to exhibit their test results ?
Using condoms is a no-brainer. We do tests with our routine health check, in my case every 3 years so far, she a few times a year. I have not had any other sex partner since my last check, she has some bad experience with HPV, probably from her previous club visits. This topic leads to restraint, we´d probably visit clubs more often.

6. When having intercourse how long does it take in average ? Do people bring toys?
I can´t say about people. Our sessions (MMMF) during the last visit took about 45-60 minutes each.

7. How orgasmic are people in average in the LS ? Do you often meet multiorgasmic women ? Are there any multiorgasmic men ? With multiorgasmic I mean the ability to have more than one orgasm in a single session
I can´t say neither. I came twice in two sessions within 2 hours or so. But that is not multiorgasmic. She can be, I saw her come three times in a row but she told me about more when she´s on her own.

8. I have heard many men are subject to performance issues thus most of them use cialis or Viagra or pt141.. is that true ?
I noticed being pretty nervous on the mat which meant being horny but not immediately visible. The precautionary taking of Cialis helped overcome the visible part of my nervousness

9. Do you disclose it to your friends ? If yes how do they react to it?
Not yet. And I probably won´t.

[eyeofthestorm]

A few other notes from my experiences in the lifestyle. Again, this may just be typical for my area or may be applicable in your area too:

I feel like continuing putting my two cents in to some of these additional answers

1) While I have met some ladies that do search for "Big Guy" types, there are many that prefer normal or smaller size. All ladies are different and to some larger guys hurt too much.
Same. Although I still can´t predict exactly which guy will attract my hotwife´s attention.

2) Some of the sex clubs can be very "Clique-Ish" meaning people sometimes tend to socialize only with a select few.
Same again. Also depends on the type of swingers attending a party.

3) There are generally 7 types of swingers
- Couples looking for another girl
- Couples looking for another guy
- Couples looking for other couples
- Bi/Gay guys looking for other guys
- Couples looking for a group of guys for his wife/girlfriend
- Couples that do not play with others but like to be watched
- Couples that just like to watch others

We´re mostly type 2, 3 and 7.

4) I rarely ever see single girls at the swing clubs. This happens maybe less than 5% of all the time I have been to clubs. Single guys are much more prevalent. The ratio at most swing clubs are about 60/40 or 75/25 guys to girls.
My experience is slightly different. I have always seen single girls and from the online platform I can say there are events where registrations from single guys and single ladies are equal. It definitely depends on the motto of the event ... I noticed a men´s surplus party today with 70 couples, 72 single men and 4 single girls ... and then there is a party only for couples and single girls with 6 Ladies and 16 couples registered.

Can´t add anything interesting to the other points so far.

[Paul7979]

A few other notes from my experiences in the lifestyle. Again, this may just be typical for my area or may be applicable in your area too:

I feel like continuing putting my two cents in to some of these additional answers

1) While I have met some ladies that do search for "Big Guy" types, there are many that prefer normal or smaller size. All ladies are different and to some larger guys hurt too much.
Same. Although I still can´t predict exactly which guy will attract my hotwife´s attention.

2) Some of the sex clubs can be very "Clique-Ish" meaning people sometimes tend to socialize only with a select few.
Same again. Also depends on the type of swingers attending a party.

3) There are generally 7 types of swingers
- Couples looking for another girl
- Couples looking for another guy
- Couples looking for other couples
- Bi/Gay guys looking for other guys
- Couples looking for a group of guys for his wife/girlfriend
- Couples that do not play with others but like to be watched
- Couples that just like to watch others

We´re mostly type 2, 3 and 7.

4) I rarely ever see single girls at the swing clubs. This happens maybe less than 5% of all the time I have been to clubs. Single guys are much more prevalent. The ratio at most swing clubs are about 60/40 or 75/25 guys to girls.
My experience is slightly different. I have always seen single girls and from the online platform I can say there are events where registrations from single guys and single ladies are equal. It definitely depends on the motto of the event ... I noticed a men´s surplus party today with 70 couples, 72 single men and 4 single girls ... and then there is a party only for couples and single girls with 6 Ladies and 16 couples registered.

Can´t add anything interesting to the other points so far.

Thanks a lot for sharing your experience.. I just didn't get the consideration on HPV . If she got it in a club, why do you think you should go more often to clubs ?

[Paul7979]

A few other notes from my experiences in the lifestyle. Again, this may just be typical for my area or may be applicable in your area too:

I feel like continuing putting my two cents in to some of these additional answers

1) While I have met some ladies that do search for "Big Guy" types, there are many that prefer normal or smaller size. All ladies are different and to some larger guys hurt too much.
Same. Although I still can´t predict exactly which guy will attract my hotwife´s attention.

2) Some of the sex clubs can be very "Clique-Ish" meaning people sometimes tend to socialize only with a select few.
Same again. Also depends on the type of swingers attending a party.

3) There are generally 7 types of swingers
- Couples looking for another girl
- Couples looking for another guy
- Couples looking for other couples
- Bi/Gay guys looking for other guys
- Couples looking for a group of guys for his wife/girlfriend
- Couples that do not play with others but like to be watched
- Couples that just like to watch others

We´re mostly type 2, 3 and 7.

4) I rarely ever see single girls at the swing clubs. This happens maybe less than 5% of all the time I have been to clubs. Single guys are much more prevalent. The ratio at most swing clubs are about 60/40 or 75/25 guys to girls.
My experience is slightly different. I have always seen single girls and from the online platform I can say there are events where registrations from single guys and single ladies are equal. It definitely depends on the motto of the event ... I noticed a men´s surplus party today with 70 couples, 72 single men and 4 single girls ... and then there is a party only for couples and single girls with 6 Ladies and 16 couples registered.

Can´t add anything interesting to the other points so far.

Also, when I asked about how the relationship with your partner evolved I was referring to the fact as to whether it has gotten better or worse.. not only from a sexual perspective....thanks again..

[eyeofthestorm]

Thanks a lot for sharing your experience.. I just didn't get the consideration on HPV . If she got it in a club, why do you think you should go more often to clubs ?

We probably would visit clubs more often if she wouldn´t think she got this from sex in a club (or from sex with a club goer) ... is what I wanted to say.

Also, when I asked about how the relationship with your partner evolved I was referring to the fact as to whether it has gotten better or worse.. not only from a sexual perspective....thanks again..

As we are new to the lifestyle as a couple, I can´t answer more precise than I did. Only two visits together so far and there are other factors that influence our relationship more than these visits. If you insist on an answer I would very carefully say it evolved to the better since.

[Paul7979]

Thanks a lot for sharing your experience.. I just didn't get the consideration on HPV . If she got it in a club, why do you think you should go more often to clubs ?

We probably would visit clubs more often if she wouldn´t think she got this from sex in a club (or from sex with a club goer) ... is what I wanted to say.

Also, when I asked about how the relationship with your partner evolved I was referring to the fact as to whether it has gotten better or worse.. not only from a sexual perspective....thanks again..

As we are new to the lifestyle as a couple, I can´t answer more precise than I did. Only two visits together so far and there are other factors that influence our relationship more than these visits. If you insist on an answer I would very carefully say it evolved to the better since.

Thanks

[eyeofthestorm]

What I forgot to say: A good partnership based on trust and communication seems to be fundamental for going to clubs together. I enjoy seeing her lust with other men which I couldn´t if that basis wouldn´t exist. We talked a lot before and after visits and we communicated by looking at each other during the activities.

[Paul7979]

What I forgot to say: A good partnership based on trust and communication seems to be fundamental for going to clubs together. I enjoy seeing her lust with other men which I couldn´t if that basis wouldn´t exist. We talked a lot before and after visits and we communicated by looking at each other during the activities.

Is it called compersion, right ?