Opinions wanted about prior work incident

[blah114]

A few years back, I was in Europe doing a large project. There were long hours. A gal flew from USA to assist, but not until later in the project. I was there seven months.

The project had its issues but we got through them. It was a migration from one system to another and we had some cab,ing issues. These got solved over a weekend (migration began Friday night). By Saturday night, we’d worked 20 hours straight managing crews, assisting with programming, and the local people were amazing. About 6 pm, we decided things were good.

This gal and I over the years had argued at work, but there was sexual tension as well. I liked her, but we are both married. There was also a time in a data center we were walking years earlier and she accidentally hit my ass. She laughed and said, “ok... that wasn’t planned...” and I laughed. It wasn’t planned..

Over the years when I’d be in her cubicle, she’d stare at my crotch and then look away. No joke. She did this a lot. But never anything else.

... back to that Saturday at 6 pm. We went to dinner just her and me. Down the street. We ate and she had a few beers. We walked back to the hotel. We were staying at same hotel. She said, “I’m not really even tired. We can still do something if you want. you can come to my room. We can watch tv”

I was an idiot. And exhausted. I’d not slept. I said I was really tired and needed to shower. She seemed disappointed l but I can’t say for sure.

Was I being propositioned? Looking back, I believe I may have been. But I cannot say for sure. I should have gone to her room. I said no. But not because I wasn’t interested. I was exhausted and I never really got hints from women over the years. I’m extremely naive. Plus I don’t really cheat, never have, but I’d have loved to have been with this gal and fucked her brains out. Just from the arguing at work over the years. I’d not have lasted but in any case, I’m unsure, to this day, if this was an offer for sex, or just watching tv. The rest of the trip, she didn’t ask or mention this visit again. I fell asleep back in the room , awoke the next day, and wondered what I’d just missed. I’d have loved to have been with this gal. She was aggressive at work, and argumentative at times, but I think she was sexual too. Again, she often stared at my crotch, but only when no on was around. And only when I was in her cube. It wasn’t all the time either... but it was noticeable. And she wanted it to be. Why? Because she’d repeat the looks and glances during the same visits.

A year or so later, she was in my cube. I for some reason mentioned I was going to a winery, and she said in a whisper , “take me with you...”

I said, “I would, too, and more.... afterwards.” It was a low whisper when I said it.

That literally came or my mouth without thought . It was quite incredible I said that. I immediately thought, “oh shit.... did I just say that ??????” In this day ad age of political correctness, judgement, and out of control double standards, I was worried for a second I’d be brought up on charges,

She laughed, said nothing, but walked away. When I saw her in the elevator later that day, she was with another gal. I got on and when they got off , she said, “byyyyyeee.....” in a very sultry, sexy voice. The other gal laughed as if they’d talked about my comment from earlier.

In any case, was I being asked for sex., above. I presume yes. A few years later, I asked her out to lunch and she said she always worked from home. I don’t believe this was a hint because she said no as well. That said, I saw her out one day and we talked.. I kept staring at her cleavage and she seemed to enjoy that, I think. She certainly didn’t move to cover it up. I also commented how her skin looked incredibly good while i stare at her cleavage. She said thank you and let me keep staring. She enjoyed it. It was getting to the point where I was getting sexually aggressive in comments.. I figured why not.

We talked for a bit and she said she’d see me around . Nothing more. I should have gone back to her room and just played it by ear, but what f she meant tv and I tried to do anything. Who’d have made the first move. It could have gotten ugly... sexual assault or harassment etc. maybe this was bantering over years, but I’m betting she’s mastubrated or fantasized about us having sex. I HOPE so, anyway. I have, for sure.

I welcome opinions. Today, I never see the gal because I left that company. I wish we’d have had a night together sexually. But it never happened. I forgot to mention years earlier, in Seattle, at a conference, she asked to see my room one night. I had a view of mountains. Looking back, I don’t know if this was a suggestion... likely not. I said ok to the room check but I recall seriously her husband called and she had some crisis at home. I went to the bar area and watched Tv for ten minutes, then decided to return to room. I’m not much into bars. We were all there in a group, too.

[thomas]

I am not sure I understand your story comprehensively... what was the result of your date with her in the winery?

[blah114]

It’s all over the place. I never went to any winery. I just told the gal I’d take her “and more...” we had banter.